What Pain Do You Want?
What do you want out of life?
We all want a lot of things in life. We want to be healthy, look fit, earn a lot of money, live comfortably, have good relationships and be happy. Yet, not a lot of us end up achieving them. Did we really want them? Or did we just give up? The truth is that we wanted the reward and not the struggle. We wanted the result and not the process. This is why the question “What do you want” doesn’t mean anything. Everyone wants to be happy, earn lots of money, have good relationships, an awesome physique, a job that they love etc etc. The problem with “wants” or desires is that they don’t tell us how to get there. They don’t help us in prioritizing. A more relevant and helpful question would be -
What pain do you want in life?
Why would we want pain? First, we should realize that no one goes through life without pain and the best we can do is to choose what pain we want. Second, every time we encounter meaningful pain, we can learn from them (if we choose to) and that’s how we grow.
What pain we encounter in life (whether we choose it or not) and what we learn from them would largely shape who we are.
A healthy life requires us to say no to junk food.
An awesome physique requires us to work out regularly.
A healthy relationship might require us to go through difficult conversations and awkward silences.
Having a high paying job requires us to put in long hours at work and make some sacrifices along the way.
Being really good at anything (sports, music, art) requires commitment and effort.
A reward requires struggle. This is not another No Pain, No Gain mantra. It is not about grit or determination or a “Don’t Quit” strategy. This is just another basic component of life!
source - The subtle art of not giving a f*ck by Mark Manson
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